New Year's Eve and I've Nowhere To Go

It's been a pretty unpleasant nine days. I haven't wanted anybody around, hated company. I barely said two words to my family when they were here. Christmas is such an overload, I had to go from being a hermit to being constantly around my family, by the 27th I just... shut down. Even when I try and force myself to talk to people, my friends, on line I can't. I just have nothing to say. I'm considering investigating getting assessed to see whether or not I do have Aspergers Syndrome beyond reasonable doubt, be that as it may, I DO have a mood disorder and I worry that this is behind my mindset in a subtle way. I don't feel like I am depressed. Just fed up with my life, which is probably what people who have never suffered clinical depression refer to as depression. So I would suggest that I am not having any kind of episode, but am feeling the effects of being unable to relate to 'normal' people within my family on an emotional level, unable to tolerate company and yet still feeling socially isolated. It's not my mood disorder- just fed up.

Ay... my life is slipping away. New year's Eve at home, the only friend within the same country as me  is seriously ill. I will visit him soon.