Friday, 13 February 2009

Medication Mishap

Embarrassing incident this week. Forgot on two occasions to take my Efexor and the second time I destabilised big time. Started off with manic energy and creativity, then I lost my focus to the extent that I couldn't even form full sentences. Confused speech and hyperactivity is a bitch to manage, I called my dad and explained to him my plans to revolutionize electroacoustic music (which now seem very tenuous it must be said) So he decided to drive to Queens Elms to collect me. Embarrasingly, I then went walkabout and met a classmate on his way to a club with his mates, and... well it can't have come off well. I wouldn't have been making much sense. He does know of my mood disorder, but now he knows I wasn't shitting him!

Still, a lot of anti-psychotics later and I'm still here, still in one piece. And back to a coherent state of mind again. Think I'll start being a bit more careful with the aul meds. Wouldn't want to do anything stupid. Got off lightly this time... I did publicly embarrass myself, but it's all par for the course. When you slip into that kind of mindset without warning, a win is not trying to rob a bank or naked jaywalking.*

*I have actually done this, no word of a lie! Really caused me a lot of problems with some of the girls I was sharing a flat with... but what can you do, you know? It took me along time not to feel ashamed, to accept I wasn't responsible for my mania.

But I will be responsible if I end up sliding back there because of negligence managing my own medication. Took me along time after the hospitalization to win back the right to handle my own meds, and I'm not gonna fuck it up. Tighter ship from now on.


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